The Fam

Three boys, ages 10, 8 and 3 are what run our lives. Yes, they are a joy, but they daily push the limit of patience. My wife Kelly of 14 years has the unenviable task of staying at home to raise them, and it is easy to sense a trying day when I walk through the door and see that look of stress. Usually the culprit is homework, where she has had to relearn long division, America's colonies, and how to undangle a participle. All this while with one arm trying to fend off a screaming 3-year old who wants more juice because he has dumped the remainder on our new rug.

Homework, fortunately, is not something I am involved in because it is usually finished by the time I get home. Meting out punishment, however, is a part of my responsibilities. Yesterday our 7-year old was a witness to a skirmish on the bus. A boy kneed another in the head, and he was promptly punished. But we soon found out the perp was incited by our child, who was mad at him and called him a "fumdart". For some reason the slighted kid took out his aggression on another child, and that's why our son Clay claimed his witness status. I was proud he used this term instead of "the big one", and laughed about it much to the chagrin of my wife. Needless to say he is now grounded, even though he still got a recent birthday party with presents and cake. Grounding a child from his own party is quite impossible......

Our three year old presents his own challenges because he is constantly surrounded by older kids. Unfortunately, he has figured out how to entertain them. An example is that he likes to pee outside no matter the temperature. The reason he continues to do this even though we have told him no is because his two older brothers are rolling on the ground in tears. Heck if it makes them laugh, must be cool. But don't cross him. Once our 10 year old, Hagen, hit the little one because he had messed up a toy. After much crying and consternation, Eli promptly went right into Hagen's room and "shoo-shooed" in his bed. Hagen discovered this "surprise" when he went to bed, and he wanted to hit Eli again. We held him back, washed his sheets, and laughed where Hagen could not see our faces.

Challenging? Give me a 10 year old (Hagen) who used to cry if you sang "Happy Birthday" to him at his own party. This is only the beginning of quirks. He is the consummate artist, and he lives in a world of imagination. This drives me nuts because sports is the farthest thing from his mind. He even calls football stupid because of the shape of the ball. Believe me, I find this insulting because I sit entire Saturdays and Sundays watching it, and live and die by my two favorite teams, the Georgia Bulldogs and the Atlanta Falcons. I dream of one day being able to watch sports with him, but right now he is content to imagine himself Luke Skywalker defending off Dementors. Oh well. But he is one of the most thoughtful and compassionate kids I have ever seen.

My wife and I are truly blessed to have three happy, healthy boys. But at times, we wonder why we did it. I have found you do not appreciate your parents until you have kids of your own, and then your parents get to laugh at you. Can't wait to laugh at my kids......